Ideas for Growing in Intimacy 

By Jane Johnson – Founder of the Ecclesia Framework

Pray through First Love Gateway prayers and by faith ask Jesus to walk through your gateway with you and cleanse and open it wide. Pray in tongues, visualize the gateway and see Jesus pour His river of life and cleansing blood through it. You should feel a renewed passion for Him as your Beloved. You should have a pain in your heart that keeps you from things that grieve Him.

Seek to write your Ketubah out, your bridal agreement with Jesus. See Ian Clayton’s teaching on Ketubah. Ask Jesus to show you in your wedding garments.

Ask Jesus to garden with you in the garden of your heart. Speak to Him in your garden. Plant what your heart desires with Him. Journal out conversations with Him. Ask Him what He thinks of you.

Spend time with Him around beautiful Heavenly waterfalls. Let Him take you on adventures with Him simply to spend time away in heaven with Him. This may be swimming together, exploring beautiful places, walking around mountains or flying. Set your desire on a place you want to go with Him. Enter in through Jesus the Door.

Envision the throne room and your Father seated there. Come boldly before His throne of grace as the Scripture says and sit with Him, present your heart ask Him to show you how He sees you and to give you the affirmation and encouragement you need.

Ask the Father to reveal His heart of love to you and your identity in Him.
By faith and your imagination visualize yourself stepping into Jesus and then into His heart and being entwined with His heart and transformed
Jesus can give us His heart. Ask. Ask for His seal on it. Ask for molding and shaping of your desires.

When you are in painful circumstances visualize Jesus putting His arm around your shoulders and remember He never leaves you. Remember that at any moment you can bury your head into His shoulder and release the struggles and burdens to Him. Every stress, pain or temptation can be a trigger or spring board to something let the pain drive you to Jesus as your safety and comfort.

Establish a “Trysting” or date time every day that you get away to be with the Lord and enjoy His company. Rest in His presence, be refreshed and be still before Him. Let this be a time He refreshes you and you surrender yourself anew to Him.

Let your time away with Him be a delight and a treasured time. It is a sacred tryst and it is not as religion names it a time to “read your Bible” or get your prayers said. Be led by Him for how He wants you to spend the together. Remind yourself that you are meeting for a date with Your eternal Bridegroom who is worthy of a top priority time in your day. Not the left overs. Give the best portion of your day to Him. When you have the fewest distractions.

Refrain from judging your alone times with Him, remember the times when it is hardest to press into Jesus, He is not judging you and He delights that you are seeking His face even when it’s not coming easily or your feelings are off. His love for us does not change based on our spiritual “temperature” that day or how many things we ‘see’ there are times we may see less or more. He is there and He is communing with us and His love does not shift. We must meet every day in faith knowing He is the rewarder of those who diligently seek Him.

Do not strive to “do” more and more in your time away with Him. Seek His face and then let Him lead you into the responsibility He wants for you that day but let it flow out of rest, love and desire. The enemy wants to make us think we must do more to “please” Him. Truly He is looking at our hearts and for a pure heart that does out of rest and love. All of our responsibility flows from that intimate place. As Heidi Baker says “out of intimacy fruit is born.”

You may feel led to journal some of your times or most of your times alone with Jesus. Journaling is a way you can remember sweet times you’ve enjoyed and also can be a tool to help curtail wandering thoughts and keep your attention on what you are hearing and seeing. At times you may need to lay it aside to just be still before Him.

Deep encounters are often silent and can be in one of the four chambers of God’s heart. Set your desire upon and go by faith to the soaking room, bridal chamber of union with Jesus, the dancing floor where your DNA is changed, God’s garden. By desire go and allow the Lord to refresh you and draw you nearer. He will show you how to as you set your desire on them. Let Him guide. Just enjoy. Silence in His presence soaking in the chamber of His heart is transforming! It’s like a heavenly oil beauty treatment.

Sit and be with Him in complete silence. No need to say a word. Look on the screen of your heart and remember He is delighting right there in just being with you. He waits for us to gaze at Him and just focus our hearts on His love. Gaze at His face within you. He dwells within you. His presence never leaves you.

You are the ark of the Most Holy Place and carry His rivers of life. Begin to practice opening up and releasing the love and peace of His presence from yourself. Neville Johnson talks about how we are completely transformed by gazing at Him inside us over time.

When you are overwhelmed or in pain take your heart to the Father or Jesus and cry with and before them. Let the Father hold you. Jesus may cry with you. His comfort is beyond words. Some of my most intimate times have been in tears with Him.

As you cry pray in tongues. If you feel a well of tears filling up your heart or spirit do not stuff it down. Let it flow out and cry in tongues. We can have deep fellowship with Him in suffering. Never cry or suffer alone. Suffering and tears are a deep invitation to draw nearer His heart.

Make Jesus a priority over your spouse if married. Let the Lord know He is your first Love and your spouse comes second. Your spouse will be blessed when you put Jesus’ love first. This means choosing to make time with the Lord even when time is tight. This doesn’t mean we neglect our spouse as the Lord wants us to love them second in place to Jesus but it does mean we do not make marriage an idol.

Ask the Lord to increase your hunger and thirst for Him. He promises to fill the hungry.

Repent for any pride or religion which blocks intimacy with the Lord. Ask for a pure heart. He delights in this prayer. The pure in heart are friends of God and enjoy a depth of intimacy that the proud cannot access. If coldness has crept in ask for the mantle of humility and for repentance.

Those who are intimate with God go through a process of brokenness with Him. Do not be discouraged when you see this. Realize He flows through the cracks in us. We learn intimacy often through the brokenness. He becomes all we need. We learn to depend on Him as our strength rather then ourselves. The broken have learned to not look to themselves but Him.

Realize His longing and desire for us is far beyond our longing for Him. This should spur us in confidence He is wooing us in love and calling us away. Visualize Jesus knocking on your door. Ask for hunger. It is a gift.

Remember Jesus is a person and that the ways we form intimacy with another person are also the ways we form intimacy with Jesus and the Father. Spending quality time, doing things together, sharing our fears, burdens, desires, hopes and tears. Including Jesus in every part of your day and acknowledging His presence with you throughout the day not just at your set aside prayer time.

Let your daily activities be done with Him beside you. Focus your thoughts upon Him through out the day. Set your eyes back on Him during key times as you wash dishes, or drive or other activities let there be triggers to see Him with you. Especially ask and seek to set your eyes on Him as you drift to sleep so that your heart engages Him all night.

Be brutally honest with the Lord. He sees all, so open and unburden your heart as you would with your closest friend. Know He understands your heart and situation better than anyone. That one thing of the Lord understanding so perfectly has drawn me close a thousand times to Jesus. It is precious when we feel so misunderstood by others to know He never misunderstands us! Talk to Him out loud when you can. Or pray in tongues while your spirit speaks to Him.

Ask Jesus to sit with you on your mountain and teach you His ways and the Beatitudes. Which are the bench marks of the kingdom and intimacy with Him.

If we have a sense of being distant to God remember that our feelings often can lie and the enemy often tries to use them against us. Remember that Jesus’ love for us does not change whether we are having a “good” spiritual day or a “bad” spiritual day. His love is just as passionate. So we can come before Him and find rest.

Never let your feelings be the bench mark of your relationship. Let faith and the knowledge of His unchanging love for you be the under pin and what upholds you within the trials and turbulence of life. Keep coming back to the constancy and goodness of His love and how you are His own. You can fully surrender to Him. Intimacy is all about trust and surrender. A living sacrifice which is our spiritual worship daily.


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Professional Pictures 043CEO. Jane Johnson B.Com Grad Dip LD, Dip Coaching.

Founder of the ECCLESIA framework in 2013, and the Heavenly Realms Support Group. Jane has worked in many different leadership capacities from being a professionally qualified Christian Leadership Coach for 13 years to many Christian leaders, to leading a ministry with the Navigators, to being a Senior Learning and Development Manager of a multimillion corporation, advising the management team on strategic approaches to get the best out of their people. She has developed considerable experience with Investors in People taking several companies through to successful accreditation and training as a consultant for them. Hence she understands the amazing impact a tool based on this principle can have.

Connect with her on LinkedIn at


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